


Still The Bravest Person I Know

by a1_kitkat



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Bisexual Kyle Valenti, Boys Kissing, Comfort, Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hand Jobs, Heartache, Kylex, M/M, Not Beta Read, Post 1x13, Public Blow Jobs, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-04
Updated: 2019-05-04
Packaged: 2020-02-18 16:00:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18702850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a1_kitkat/pseuds/a1_kitkat
Summary: for @erisgregory on tumblrAlex has an emotional break down at his father’s bedside and Kyle is there to comfort him in every way he needs





	Still The Bravest Person I Know

Alex was sitting, alone, at the counter in the Crashdown having just finished his burger and was savoring what was left of his fries by dipping them in his milkshake. 

Liz’s eyes kept flickering from whatever she was doing; taking an order, handing out change, clearing a table, over to Alex at the counter. He’d barely spoken to her since he’d placed his order and it was unsettling. She hated that one of her best friends was barely speaking to her and that her two best friends weren’t talking to each other. Liz understood, of course, but damn it hurt.

She moved back to the counter and, with a wide friendly smile, tried to engage with Alex.

 

“Hey, you need a refill on that shake?” She asked him.

“Nah” he waved her off. “I’m good, Liz”

“Nothing else I can get you?”

 

Alex pulled out his wallet and threw a bunch of notes onto the counter.

“How about my best friend back?” He snapped though she knew he didn’t mean to.

“Alex” she reached out and placed her hand on his “I am so sorry that you’re hurting-”

“Forget about it, Liz. I’m tired of being lied to all the time”

 

He snatched his hand away, slipped of the stool and walked out of the cafe with his head held high but once outside he took a slow, deep breath. 

A large group of summer tourists walked by clearly on their way to the UFO Emporium and he felt a brief stab of pain. What had once filled him with happiness, the memory of his first kiss with Guerin, just made him feel sad now.

He took a step and paused when he saw a couple of alien enthusiasts, could tell from their matching shirts and antennas, walking down the street. They were holding hands and smiling at each other, so clearly in love. Both of them were men and neither appeared bothered by their actions or the choice looks some of the locals were giving them.

Alex didn’t know if they did it on purpose, to get a reaction or if they really were oblivious; when the taller of the two leaned down to kiss the other, a passerby spat at their feet and called them a ‘pair of fags’. To their credit, they simply shared another happy kiss before clasping hands and continuing down the street.

He didn’t know if he was glad he witnessed the exchange or not. Seeing a queer couple who were happy, out, together and in love was all he’d ever wanted. He wanted to be  _that guy_ ,  who had the confidence to walk down the street holding hands with the man he loved... but he’d grown up here, in this small town and the treatment of that young, happy couple was, for some baffling reason, socially acceptable behavior while their actions were the ones deemed ‘wrong’.

 

Alex had, on numerous occasions, fantasied about what it would be like to go  anywhere in this town and just be himself. 

In high school, the jibes, the jokes and the teasing were a constant reminder that he wasn’t like everyone else. 

In the Air Force, before they rescinded DADT, he’d been forced back into the closet but was still very aware that he wasn’t like everyone else. 

His last deployment was cut shot due to his injury and he was sent back to Roswell where the town welcomed him home a hero but their eyes were filled with sympathy because he’d lost his leg. Walking around town with the crutch, everywhere he went, people were apologetic and sympathetic because he’d lost a part of himself and was no longer like everyone else.

He shoved his hands into his pockets, lowered his head and started away from the cafe, away from UFO Emporium, away from everything that hurt. 

When he’d come home, the only people who hadn’t looked at him differently were Maria and Arturo. Though Maria had been quick to give him free drinks and Arturo always gave him extra fries. Liz had thanked him for his service but otherwise she’d treated him as she always had... And Guerin; Guerin hadn’t even flinched, had never looked at him differently. He had, and still did, look at him the way he always had with those deep hazel eyes filled with love and lust. When they’d fallen into Guerin’s bed, he’d been exactly the same if maybe a little more desperate, needy and aroused... but his leg had never been the problem.

Alex walked until that leg hurt now then he continued to walk some more until the pain was a lot but even then he continued to press on and only stopped when he reached the hospital.

 

Alex made his way inside, passed by the nurses station with a sad smile and into his father’s room. The man who had terrorized him, made his teen years almost unbearable, looked so peaceful in his coma. Each time Alex visited him, his mind filled with images of all the awful things his father had ever done to him, and he resisted the tiny voice in his head that was telling him to smother him with a pillow.

He sank down in the chair and sighed with the relief of taking the weight off his leg. He planned to stay awhile so Alex removed the prosthetic and carefully placed it aside then he moved the chair closer to the bed and just stared at the helpless man before him. There were so many things he wanted to say to his father but he was also still partially afraid of the power the man still had. It terrified him to think his father had shot Kyle in cold blood, had outright tried to murder him. Alex could still remember the bruises on Kyle when his friend had shown him what his father had done.

 

Alex closed his eyes and took a deep breath. In his mind, he kept flickering between the bruises on Kyle’s chest and Guerin’s disfigured hand then he remembered the video of Jesse pushing Jim into the cell with the tumor-giving alien. 

His father murdered Jim Valenti; the one man who’d looked out for Alex in his youth, who’d tried to protect him from his own father...

 

He felt the tears forming beneath his closed eyelids and reached up to rub his eyes, attempted to stave them off.

His mother had been hurt by his father to the point she’d had to leave; Guerin had loved him and given Alex a piece of his heart, the taste of his lips and the touch of his body only to have his father destroy his hand. Guerin had only ever tried to protect him and that had been his punishment for loving Alex; 

Kyle had treated him badly in the past but he was damn well trying to move Heaven & Earth to make it up to him now. When Kyle had learned of Alex’s feelings for Michael, he’d encouraged him to seek him out and try to get on the same page. Kyle had accepted him for who he was and who he loved and Alex’s father had shot him. 

Jim Valenti had been the father figure Alex wanted and needed. He’d seen the way Jesse treated him, knew the severe beatings he’d been on the receiving end of and had even patched him up a few times. Jim had _cared_ for  Alex like he was his own and Alex had envied Kyle for having such a kind soul of a father to look up to and admire.

Every person who dared to care about Alex in any way, got hurt or worse, because they’d cared. It made him feel sick to his stomach. He opened his eyes and looked at his father with absolute hatred.

It was one thing for him to hate his own son but to go out of his way to hurt the people who actually loved and cared about him?

But seeing the man, peacefully at ease and no longer a threat just made his eyes soften. Alex despised everything his father had done to him but the man was still his father, had loved his mother so much they’d brought four children into the World together. 

There was a photo that had once hung on the Manes’ living room of Jesse holding a one day old Alex in his arms and smiling down at him. The photo had vanished years ago but Alex remembered it, knew there had once been a time when his father  had loved and cared about him.

 

He couldn’t stay here any longer; he reached for his prosthetic and affixed it as he blinked back tears. He shouldn’t have come here, not while in this state of mind. Alex got to his feet and turned around to find Kyle standing in the doorway, looking at him.

“Kyle” Alex greeted him. He blinked a few times, trying to get rid of his tears.

“My shift ended ten minutes ago” Kyle explained “I just came to check on him”

 

Kyle stepped into the room then closed the door for privacy, so they could talk freely.

“I don’t blame you for what you did” Alex explained. “It was self defense”

“I’m a doctor, Alex” Kyle moved closer and gently pushed Alex back down into the seat. “Do no harm, remember?”

“He shot you”

The tears became more prominent in Alex’s eyes.

“He shot you” Alex repeated but more to himself.

 

Kyle was standing in front of Alex so he wrapped his arms around him and pulled him in close. Alex’s heart was pounding as the tears he’d been fighting back began to pour from his eyes. Everything he’d been bottling up inside was fighting to come out all at once so he just let it.

“I hate this, Kyle!” He sobbed. “I hate what he did to me, to you, to Guerin. I hate that I spent my life being afraid of the one person I was supposed to look up to, to admire. The one person who was supposed to love and protect me! Unconditionally! He’s my father and he treated me like garbage... I was his personal punching bag and no one... no one stopped him! Your father... your father tried, Kyle, he tried and he was killed because of it”

 

Kyle gently rubbed his hand up and down Alex’s back but he didn’t speak.

“This entire, stupid small town was suffocating” Alex continued “the only good  thing, the one thing that made me feel safe and accepted was Guerin. He kissed me, held me and loved me... and made me feel like I wasn’t a  _ freak _ . That being gay, being me wasn’t something to be ashamed of but then my father came in and the way he looked at us... looked at  _ me _ , like I was the disappointment when it was _him_ all  along” he let out another sob “Guerin was only protecting me and my father destroyed his hand! Guerin told my father not to touch me so he went after him instead... and do you know what he said to him? While he was smashing Guerin’s fingers... he said ‘this’ll teach _you_ to  not touch my son again’. The first time in years that he called me ‘his son’ was while causing pain to the only boy who dared to touch me”

 

Kyle’s eyes shifted to the unconscious man in the bed; he just wanted to march over there and pull the plug himself but Alex was clinging to him and he couldn’t let him go. He just continued to rub his back in a soothing manner.

“And he shot you, Kyle” Alex cried “he point blank shot you; if you hadn’t been wearing the vest” he shuddered “and no one would’ve found you in time” he sobbed “I keep picturing you, bleeding out on the floor of the bunker and I can’t stand it... Can’t stand the thought of him hurting you like that! I’m glad you did what you did to defend yourself, Kyle because the idea of him hurting you because of me... I hate it!”

 

Kyle finally pulled away and looked down at his distraught friend. He brought a hand up, placed it upon Alex’s chin and urged him to look up at him, to meet his gaze.

“Hey, your dad shooting me wasn’t your fault” Kyle insisted “he wanted to silence me over what we saw at Caulfield. He’s pissed that the place blew up but, Alex, I knew that after he was done with me that he’d go after you... and I couldn’t let him hurt _you_ again . Not after all he’s already put you through”

“Kyle-“

“You were right; your dad  _is_ a  monster but you’re not his only victim and his choices, his decisions, the people he chose to hurt, that’s on him, not you. He brought me into Project Shepherd, not you. He involved me instead of you”

“Because he didn’t trust me” Alex argued “he believed me too weak for such a mission because my _perversion_ makes  me weak... weak for Guerin anyway... He didn’t think I’d bring his entire operation down to protect the ones _I_ love ” 

 

“You are not weak” Kyle dropped to his knees so he could be on eye level with Alex and looked into his tear filled eyes “Alex, I meant what I said, you’re the bravest person I know. You have been through more than any one person should... a homophobic, abusive dick of a father, years of childish but cruel bullying from someone who was supposed to be your friend-“

“Ky-”

“Then you survived a war zone, _several_ of  them actually and you came home to a town you hated, a father you despised and yet you still opened your heart to the boy you’re still in love with and gave forgiveness to the jerk who bullied you”

“Kyle-”

“You’re the _bravest_ person  I know” Kyle repeated as he stood back up “the bravest I will ever know and I wish that you could see that. I  wish  that you could see yourself the way that I see you”

“You mean some sad, lonely, pining gay who can’t seem to let go of his pain?”

 

“You are not alone” Kyle insisted “you’re hurting now; wrestling with a broken heart and feelings of betrayal but you’re stronger than that. You survived your father, you survived Iraq and Baghdad, you forgave an insensitive, insecure bully and you survived an explosion in a top secret prison... you went through all that  and you’re still standing strong”

 

Alex slowly reached out his hand and gripped Kyle’s shirt. The doctor froze but waited, watching to see what the soldier would do next. Alex carefully, methodically, slowly unbuttoned his shirt and parted the material to expose Kyle’s muscular chest then he reached up and tentatively brushed his fingertips across what was left of the bruises the bullets had left on his skin.

Kyle gasped and bit down on his lip while Alex continued to gently touch and caress his faded bruises. He forced his body not to tense and he waited, waited for Alex; who leaned forward and softly placed a single kiss to the bruised skin. Kyle closed his eyes and just lost himself to Alex’s tenderness.

But he didn’t want tenderness, not really. He just wanted  _ Alex _ . Whose lips were so soft and gentle on his skin; Kyle’s heart was racing until he realized Alex had stopped. 

His eyes flew open and he looked down at the beautiful soul sitting before him, who was staring up at him with nervous eyes and Kyle let out a breath. He reached down, slid his arms around Alex and pulled him to his feet.

 

Alex was unsteady, his leg still aching from the prosthetic and the extreme amount of walking he’d done that day, but he looked into Kyle’s eyes and waited with the same nervousness that he’d had while standing opposite Guerin in the UFO Emporium so many years ago. 

But this time, Alex took the leap; he leaned close and kissed Kyle.

 

His prosthetic was rubbing, hurting, but he ignored it because Kyle was  _ kissing him back _ . Kyle’s arms were around him, holding him steady and he felt safe, protected, loved and  wanted . Alex broke the kiss long enough to let out a quiet sob of relief and Kyle simply smiled at him; Kyle’s smile was reassuring and poignant, said more to Alex than his words ever could.

But Kyle was a Doctor and he didn’t fail to miss the pained expression on Alex’s face, he knew without a word that it was his leg causing it so Kyle scooped him up, spun him around and deposited him on the bed which was slightly higher than the chairs.

Alex gasped with relief but immediately wrapped his arms around Kyle’s neck and pulled him down to meet him in another fiercely possessive kiss. 

 

Neither of them said a word, lips too busy as they both fought for dominance; Alex because he craved it, Kyle because he desired it. He parted Alex’s legs and moved closer to him, wanting to be as close as possible but a little unsure of where it was okay to touch him.

Alex was less hesitant and while his lips claimed Kyle’s, his hands were clawing at the buttons of his pants and he was quick to wrap his long fingers around Kyle’s hardening cock.

 

Kyle groaned into Alex’s kiss the second he felt his fingers on him and he buried his own fingers in Alex’s hair, held him in a possessive yet desperate embrace. Then he started to move his hips, thrusting into Alex’s touch and he dropped his head onto his friends shoulder as they worked together to bring Kyle closer to the brink. 

 

He opened his eyes and looked over Alex’s shoulder where he could see the shape of Jesse Manes’s foot and his eyes trailed up his body to his still sleeping form and he couldn’t help himself, Kyle  laughed . 

The vibrations shook his body and Alex had to bring his other hand up, place it on his chin and urge Kyle to look into his eyes but Kyle moved close to whisper in his ear.

 

“Imagine if he woke up right now” he teased “and saw what we were doing”

 

Kyle wasn’t sure what reaction he expected from Alex but the brave soldier inside him jerked his wrist, tugged very hard on Kyle’s dick in response then he too laughed.

 

“Let the bastard watch” Alex whispered “I’ll show him what a real Manes man can do”

He hastily shoved Kyle’s pants down then swiftly took the man’s hard cock into his mouth and Kyle swore louder than any soldier Alex had ever served with. 

 

Alex relaxed his throat and made certain to take in all that was Kyle Valenti; using skills he’d learned from his travels around the world, Alex continually brought Kyle to the edge but wouldn’t let him fall. It was agony, torture, and Kyle absolutely  loved every second of it. The way Alex’s teeth scraped his flesh, his tongue teased the head and his warm, moist mouth was perfection.

Kyle had been on the receiving end of many blowjobs over the years but none would ever compare to this. He didn’t care that he was at work, in a patient’s room, getting his dick sucked by that patient’s  son . It was beyond insane but he didn’t want to stop, he never wanted him to stop. 

 

He was so close, was silently begging and pleading for Alex to let him go. Mouth just wordlessly opening and closing while Alex continued to work him until he couldn’t last any longer. With one hand in Alex’s hair and the other firmly over his own lips, Kyle came. His seed spilled forth, into Alex’s eager mouth and down his throat. Kyle felt himself going weak at the knees from the intensity of his orgasm but he managed to make it into the chair before his legs completely gave out. 

 

He was still panting, waiting for his heart rate to return to normal when he looked up at Alex, who was still on the bed, and saw him slowly lick his lips while holding Kyle’s gaze.

 

“Fuck, Alex” he finally managed to find his voice again.

“We probably shouldn’t here” Alex quipped as he leaned back on the bed, looked at Kyle with a twinkle in his eye “I mean this  is a hospital and we really should  respect the patients”

The sassy tone of Alex’s voice made Kyle want to jump him right there, fuck Jesse Manes who was in a coma just inches away from them; he wanted to take Alex right under Jesse’s nose.

 

With trembling hands, it took three attempts for Kyle to readjust his pants. He finally managed to stand up and Alex was already by his side so he kissed him and damn he could taste  himself in Alex’s kisses. Fuck it was hot!

Alex buttoned up Kyle’s shirt but only after placing another kiss to his chest, this one right over his heart.

 

“Is your leg still hurting you?” Kyle asked him, concern in his voice.

“A bit” Alex hated to admit “I uh I walked here from the Crashdown”

“You what?”

“I had a lot on my mind and it helped”

 

Kyle understood so he nodded his head.

“Okay” he said with a sigh “but don’t even think about walking home on that leg”

 

Alex smiled, coyly licked his lips and looked into Kyle’s eyes from beneath his lashes.

“Will you take me home?” He whispered in an obscenely sexy tone.

Kyle made a sound somewhere between a groan and a whimper but was too aroused to feel embarrassed especially given the way Alex was looking at him.

“It would be my pleasure to take you home, Alex” Kyle said with a smile.

 

Alex leaned into him, ran his fingers along Kyle’s neck and kissed him.

“No, it will be both our pleasure, Kyle” Alex whispered in his ear.

“Come on, soldier, lets get out of here”

 

Kyle started towards the door but Alex didn’t immediately follow when he turned back it was to see Alex standing by Jesse’s bedside, just staring down at him.

 

“I’m not ashamed of who I am, dad” Alex said to the unconscious man “but I am ashamed of you. You made me think, made me believe that I was in the wrong, that what I felt was wrong” he looked to Kyle “that who I fell in love with was wrong... but  you were the one who was wrong, dad. I am capable of being loved, loved by someone... someone special...”

 

Kyle held out his hand to Alex who immediately walked towards him, took hold of the offered hand and pulled him into his arms.

 

“Let’s go home”

 

 


End file.
